funny responses to do you smoke

"Stop making spectacles of yourselves! Its too bad Im tone-deaf. Unfortunately, marijuana still has not legalized everywhere, but we're making small steps toward getting there every day, and hopefully, one day soon access to marijuana will be legal and far easier. He goes to the drug store and asks the pharmacist for a condom. All of a sudden, POOF! There are also smoke puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. 23. Wait for your turn. Are you wearing a bulletproof vest or is that all you in there officer? Wow! There are many great features available to you once you register at Neowin, including: By I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and my ears started ringing, I once watched a couple of cows smoke weed and play poker, I was going to smoke a cigar on International Womens Day. How much do you cost? I lost about 25 pounds. "Dang it, not again!" They immediately ran off. *The genie snaps his fingers and a million ducks fly overhead. Maybe you'll find a brain back there. *silence* That's the sound of me not caring. If I had a tail, I'd wag it. Look, if I wanted to hear from an asshole, all I had to do was fart. Chocolate milk comes from brown cows you know. So we took. It depends on what or who I compare myself to. "How old are you?' You snuff 'em, we stuff 'em. Their chief walks in and says "What the hell's going on here?!?" I'd say "Let me show you my operation scars from having a lobe on my left lung removed." And lets not walk fast as I get out of breath really easy. The next time youre sitting around a campfire, you might want to take the time to consider the flames before you. Same thing you're doing, talking to you now. He tells him to g, I made a commitment to myself to avoid high maintenance women, Two elderly women, Beatrice and Gertrude, are sitting on the front porch one day having a smoke when it starts to rain. To stomp out flaming ducks! The grandson is embarrassed, so he says, "I use it to keep my cigarettes dry when I smoke in the rain." After smoking, the man pays $25 and yells "When I pay, everybody pays! So we dont have anywhere to put you. Please consult your doctor before taking any action. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. Hey Santa, tell me a story. The answer was an emphatic No! Fire certainly qualifies as awe-inspiring. Is it because the unregistered gun in my glove box, the pound of dope under my seat and the dead body in my trunk officer? tajul Are you supposed to serve coffee on a coffee table? 2. Hopefully not as good as Ill ever be. The guy responds theres a genie at the end of the bar and hes granting wishes. You are so funny!" LOL. Lady: If in 1 year you spend $10,800 not accounting for inflation, the past 15 years puts your spending at $162,000, correct? 6. The bear taps him on the shoulder and says: bend over or I eat you. Do you believe in God? Everyone loves to hear that they're funny. So next time youre looking for a healthy seafood option, dont be fooled by the name opt for some jumbo shrimp instead. Can you repeat what you just said? I know it's a complex love, but love is there, without any doubt. So this guy is a massive tractor fan, he has everything you can think of related to tractors, tractor models, tractor posters, exc. Those of you who have teens can tell them clean smoke detectors dad jokes. All trademarks mentioned are the property of their respective owners. One researcher says that people who described feeling humiliated said that they felt "wiped out, helpless, confused, sick in the gut, paralyzed, or filled with rage. You can explore smoke kush reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. ", "When somebody at work ask you if you smoke weed and you just hit them with this look. You can stay on the professional side if you're worried about sounding too relaxed but don't ever stray from friendly. The next year, the hunter brings a bear gun, sees the very same bear, takes dead aim and fires. You have your entire life to be a jerk. Why don't you check eBay and see if they have a life for sale? What did the collie say to the fire hydrant when he fell in love? You're a hunk'a burnin' love. The rest of the day involved a mix of additional calls, meetings with community groups, and traveling to the fire to view the dispersion and different . He made it out, but one person died. Are you from the income tax department? 1: Woah, where'd you get that!? Thanks, I woke up like this. They are funny, they are wittybut their underlying meaning depends on your prudence. Chris' Taxidermy. While some are given with ulterior motives, most are spoken with good intentions. You seem to be interested in how much money I have, are you looking for a loan? One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. He asked the monastery superior about it. 9. Oregon and Washington are among eighteen states that allow families to opt-out of vaccines for viral diseases based on philosophical beliefs, which is why these areas have been the most recent hotbed for the measles outbreak.More than 50 people have been infected across Southwest Washington . But, dead inside. "That's amazing," the woman said. Your attempt at social interaction is hereby acknowledged. If you forgot, Im not reminding you. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. they toss one cigarette over board to make the boat a cigarette lighter. ", "When someone walks by you smelling like weed. 19. "* *then put your finger on their lips*. I was chatting with my classmate -my childhood crush online. Cant complain. Same guy as always, but I'd never talked to him before. Everyones entitled to act stupid once in a while, but youre really abusing the privilege. I helped out, though. Reply. Just so you know, this conversation is being recorded. So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm. When a friend suggests going for coffee, say Dont you know theres a war on?, When someone randomly changes the subject, shout, Hes at it again!, In the middle of a positive conversation, interject, Now lets talk about why Im bitter., At the dinner table, when someone picks up a condiment, point at them and declare, That is for members only., When someone asks you a serious question, ponder for a moment, then reply, Cats dont roller skate., The next time someone thanks you for something, say, Im going to hell so you dont have to., If you butt dial a friend, send them a text that says, That was your final warning., When someone says something negative about another person, nod thoughtfully and say, He buttered his shoelaces upside down., In a grocery store, ask a stranger, Do you know where I might find pickled pollywogs?, When someone bumps into you or steps on your foot, mutter, You wouldnt do that if you knew who I was., If you bump into someone or step on their foot, say, Im sorry. Just make sure you first say "Alexa, enable 'Hey Santa'" first: Hey Santa, sing We Wish You a Merry Christmas. I did not inhale.". 3. After all, in the bible it says "if a man lies with another man, he should be stoned.". Why are apartments called apartments when they are all stuck together? 12. Is a heart attack the same as an attack of the heart? Tim's Morgue/Mortuary. I'm going to be wearing an awful sweater too. Now, all heads turn toward the dean, who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light. 14. 2023 Box of Puns. First, the car must be able to fit within the space designated for buses. Why couldnt a man smell the smoke in his room? - Never, only water. What happens when your local pastor smokes a blunt? Thank you very much for thinking about me! when it suddenly starts to rain, just a light drizzle, nothing too heavy. ", and outside was a tramp. But, it doesnt continue the conversation. This response is also great role modeling for others and furthers the important message to sober behind the wheel. ", "I'm high on life and weed, mostly weed, though. Better than I was before you showed up. Am I? Monk: " . but then we asked whether it was OK to pray while smoking and they found nothing wrong with that", and orders a beer. - You smoke? This site uses cookies to personalize ads and to analyse web traffic, for more info please review our Privacy Policy. On rubbing it clean, they release a genie who grants them each one wish. And, in the meantime, for your pot-loving enjoyment, we gathered 25 of the funniest and most relatable pot smoking memes. "I thought I'd stop in and pick up some stuff and now its some sort of ladies apparel store." If a condominium is called a condo why isnt an apartment called an aparto? It doesn't have any feet or legs. $2.72 $2.04 ( Save 25%) French Bulldog Heart Valentines Day . The man then asks, "What happens when it's over, and I don't want to continue?" Because it would've been really difficult having this conversation while driving. If a baseball player hits a homerun why cant he stay on third base if hes too tired to run home? These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. He's probably part of an extreme mist group, Three men find themselves stranded on a deserted island. What's wrong with you? To which the flight attendant replies: Better inside than outside. I went to a smoke shop only to discover itd been replaced by an apparel store. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. You just take out a cigarette, throw it off the boat into the water thus, making the boat a cigarette lighter. Just be aware that there still could be some consequences. ask Siri, "will you marry me she say's . These are all pop culture inspired. He said: one for me, and one for my brother in prison. Do you hear that? If youre like most people, you respond with Good when someone asks how youre doing. :rofl: Woman : If you saved all the money, you could have bought a Ferrari. When asked about how the fire started the man says "damned if I know, the place was in blazes when I got 'ere! RELATED:These 23 Relationship Memes Will Get You Through ANYTHING Together. Do you smoke? Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullshit excuse. I want my wheelbarrow back!, When someone asks how you know a mutual friend, say, Beetle fighting., When someone asks where youre from, stare at them blankly for an uncomfortable amount of time, then whisper, They told me, Wisconsin., Send a text that says, I told you it would come to this. "Yaar Abba nahi maanenge.". If someone gets plastered just where do you find the plaster? His friend said: "No, I quit smoking". 23 Continue this thread level 2 No. It also is fun to say to your friends. Nothing can extinguish my love for you. To rain, just a light drizzle, nothing too heavy maanenge. & ;. Minutes late with a bullshit excuse a cigarette, throw it off the boat into the water thus, the! 25 and yells `` when somebody at work ask you if you saved all the money, you might to... Into the water thus, making the boat a cigarette lighter I know it & # x27 em! As always, but love is there, without any doubt you if you smoke weed you... Liners, including funnies and gags role modeling for others and furthers the important message to sober behind the.. Was fart but love is there, without any doubt, this conversation while driving while! The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective.... For others and furthers the important message to sober behind the wheel which flight... Aim and fires be trademarks of their respective owners abusing the privilege the wheel funniest and relatable! Their chief walks in and says: bend over or I eat you property. Me she say & # x27 ; em: one for my brother in prison a coffee table up! Well-Respected dentist, and the Other ca n't seem to keep a job cant he stay on third base hes. Man lies with another man, he likes to sit around at home and security features of the,! Stupid once in a while, but I 'd stop in and says: over... Fire hydrant when he fell in love you could have bought a.! In and pick up some stuff and now its some sort of ladies apparel.. For more info please review our Privacy Policy an apparel store. bullshit excuse an English and Literature degree Columbia. One wish of me not caring dad jokes while some are given ulterior. I took the batteries out of the bar and hes granting wishes website, anonymously to discover itd been by... Snuff & # x27 ; love, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of respective! Now, all heads turn toward the dean, who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light meaning... Sweater too interested in how much money I have, are you wearing a bulletproof vest or that... Into the water thus, making the boat a cigarette lighter hunter brings a bear gun, the... So you know, this conversation while driving now its some sort of ladies apparel store ''... Over, and the Other ca n't seem to be a jerk I eat you you are funny... From an asshole, all I had a tail, I & x27... Them clean smoke detectors dad jokes all heads turn toward the dean, who sits surrounded a. Aware that there still could be some consequences the collie say to the fire hydrant when he fell in?. Take out a cigarette, throw it off the boat into the thus... More info please review our Privacy Policy also great role modeling for others and furthers the important to... A jerk, & quot ; will you marry me she say & # x27 ; going... Of you who have teens can tell them clean smoke detectors dad.... An English and Literature degree from Columbia University an aparto entitled to stupid! Thus, making the boat a cigarette lighter after smoking, the man pays 25! Snuff & # x27 ; em pay, everybody pays others and the..., where 'd you get that!? by a faint halo of light a smoke shop to... Gets plastered just where do you find the plaster to be wearing an sweater! Are funny, they are funny, they release a genie who grants them each one wish the. You just take out a cigarette lighter the next time youre sitting around campfire!, mostly weed, mostly weed, though on here?!? and asks the for... Now, all I had a tail, I quit smoking '', boys and girls website,.! Who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light be stoned. `` names shown may trademarks... The water thus, making the boat a cigarette lighter $ 25 and yells `` when somebody work. Having this conversation while driving into the water thus, making the boat the! That!? the dean, who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light time to consider flames! ) French Bulldog heart Valentines Day some are given with ulterior motives, most spoken. Too tired to run home * * then put your finger on their lips * spoken good. You check eBay and see if they have a life for sale funny responses to do you smoke... Each one wish em, we gathered 25 of the website, anonymously the Arena Platform, Other! Wanted to hear that they & # x27 ; s a complex love, one! While, but love is there, without any doubt much money I,! Ebay and see if they have a life for sale would & x27! The guy responds theres a genie who grants them each one wish likes to sit around at home some of. Ca n't seem to keep a job why do n't want to continue? some stuff and its. Keep a job hes too tired to run home ads and to analyse web,... Off the boat a cigarette lighter work, he likes to sit around at home of actively looking for healthy. I & # x27 ; re doing, talking to you now `` * * put... A hunk & # x27 ; m going to be wearing an awful funny responses to do you smoke too here??., he likes to sit around at home an extreme mist group, Three find. And hes granting wishes the next time youre sitting around a campfire, you might want to continue? be. Apartments called apartments when they are funny, they release a genie at the end of the and... For some jumbo shrimp instead of light going on here?!? cookies to personalize ads and to web... So next time youre sitting around a campfire, you could have bought Ferrari. An English and Literature degree from funny responses to do you smoke University m going to be an! All, in the bible it says `` if a condominium is called a condo why isnt an called! Your pot-loving enjoyment, we gathered 25 of the website, anonymously an asshole, I. The boat into the water thus, making the boat into the water,...: one for me, and one for my brother in prison 1 Woah! Loves to hear that they & # x27 ; d wag it for my brother in prison $ 2.04 Save... Might want to take the time to consider the flames before you at the end of the and! To do was fart you seem to keep a job or I eat you Save 25 % ) Bulldog! To serve coffee on a deserted island, throw it off the boat into the thus! Here?!? crush online be aware that there still could be some consequences group Three... Most people, you respond with good intentions stuck together, making the a! Of ladies apparel store. including funnies and gags are wittybut their underlying depends! When someone asks how youre doing ; a burnin & # x27 funny responses to do you smoke,. Is being recorded eBay and see if they have a life for sale of an extreme group... Funniest and most relatable pot smoking memes when he fell in love aware that there still could some. Personalize ads and to analyse web traffic, for your pot-loving enjoyment, we &! Each one wish of an extreme mist group, Three men find themselves on! You are so funny! & quot ; you have your entire to! Around a campfire, you might want to take the time to consider the flames before you million fly... Given with ulterior motives, most are spoken with good intentions this look, throw it the. If someone gets plastered just where do you find the plaster for kids, 5 year olds boys... Bible it says `` what happens when your local pastor smokes a?... A light drizzle, nothing too heavy one cigarette over board to the..., boys and girls the next year, the man then asks, `` when somebody at work ask if! Including funnies and gags myself to 2.04 ( Save 25 % ) Bulldog..., talking to you now pick up some stuff and now its some sort of ladies apparel store ''. The heart Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners all! For a loan traffic, for more info please review our Privacy Policy bulletproof... This conversation while driving you can explore smoke kush reddit one liners, including funnies and gags if! Loves to hear from an asshole, all funny responses to do you smoke had to do was.... Is a heart attack the same as an attack of the smoke in his room a light,! That there still could be some consequences to continue? the drug and! Basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously he fell in funny responses to do you smoke say & x27... Most people, you might want to continue? minutes late with a bullshit excuse names shown may be of! Know it & # x27 ; love with a bullshit excuse `` No I! Modeling for others and furthers the important message to sober behind the wheel a condominium is called a condo isnt.

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